The Beginning

It was a cold night , the coldest one i could remember,i remember being forced by sheer brute force by a man in his forties, i couldn't not make it whether he was trying to help me or his intentions were something else, i was going to learn that over the course of  next week.
   I remember when i was young,mother always used to run after me and play with me, i can still hear her beautiful voice echoing in my ears, this voice has given me countless nightmares, i felt caught up in the rumination of these voices , the sound of my dad returning home from the fields and lifting me up in his arms, the glow in his eyes when he saw me, he was a farm labor but he was the most enthusiastic person i have ever known in my life, someone who would never let the family spirits demoralize even in the harshest of times, my mother was 5 months pregnant ,when tragedy struck,i clearly remember it was the 20th of August 1988,my mom's birthday,around midnight everything started shaking and the next thing i remember was the crushed face of my mother and the cries of my father who was buried beneath a beam of concrete , i tried to help him , but it was too much weight for a little girl , i still curse myself for being so fragile and insufficient at that moment , my dad was shouting for me to run ,he was crying out loud "Run Manisha , get the hell out of here ,save yourself " . i had not wanted to leave them , i was crying , i still have tears in my eyes while i am sharing this with you , to state a true fact ,only a handful of people have known about my misery , but now i want to share it with the world , i want the world to know about my hardships , what i went through and how i became what i am today !

Please keep reading my blog for more

Sincerely
Manisha !   

1988 Earthquake

The earthquake that took away , the most priced possession of my life away from me , and forced me into something so gruesome and disgusting, something that ruined my life,my dreams , something that took my soul with it , i was forced to sell my soul to the devil,to stay alive as a corpse, i tried killing myself  thinking that the sounds in my head will cease believing that the pain will go, the miseries will end but i was wrong , the guy who took me away from my ailing father and dead mom was not really helping , he saved my life and took me to Kathmandu, the capital of Nepal, i was treated at the local hospital for minor bruises ,but i felt no pain,i was lost in space,one moment i was sleeping with my parents and the other i saw them struggle for their lives,well actually it was just my father who was struggling , my mom and the little baby inside her must have died on the spot, i was filled with melancholy , the tragic demise of my father and mother ceased all the desires and ambitions and dreams of mine , i had always wanted to see a hospital,now i was sitting in one of them ,yet i felt nothing, my fathers dream of making me a doctor had died with him,i was not interacting with the nurse who was trying to be considerate of the fact that i was a eight year old girl who had lost her family few hours ago, my tears had dried up, my life had taken the most tragic turn, i remember there were many people along with me in the hospital, which was filled with the smell of blood and cries of loss and pain and there were doctors and nurses running around to help everyone and anyone who was brought in , but i am they could not do much about the situation, i was treated and given some medicines , after which the guy who had brought me in,took me with him 

Thanks for reading the story will continue 

Yours 

Manisha 

New Home

The man who saved my life was a tall ,heavy built person ,with a mustache that looked fake,he didn't talk much, but he did try comforting me,i was rather scared of him, he took me with him to his home ,which was a long journey to a small village near Kathmandu,it was a overnight journey we were travelling in a bus,i could not believe the fact that i had lost my family and now i was on my way to an unknown land with a complete stranger in a bus filled with people who kept staring me , there were injured people ,some people were really old and i was wondering if they will be able to make it through the journey, i kept thinking different things when finally i slept off , the next thing i saw was a hut made of large logs and the roof was covered with grass. this guy lets call him the captain was carrying me in his arms towards the hut , i felt his strong body around me ,it was something really different from my father, it was nothing like his tender and soft touch , it was more of something that had insecurity and and overwhelming feeling something that can be best described as the feeling one would get after finally hunting down an animal ,in the hut i met the devil himself,it was like meeting an angel first, but later on i realized it was the Devil disguised as a motherly loving young woman,she looked very beautiful , she must have been in her thirties ,very pale skin with dark hair and a flawless complexion ,she had a smile that can lighten up anyone, she immediately took me in her arms and kissed me on my forehead ,telling me that she was so lucky to have found such a beautiful little girl over the course of the following day she provided me everything,she did look a bit similar to my own mother , who was crushed to death, she would pate my back,she kept on telling me that everything will be fine,her voice it was marvelous , it was enchanting something that felt so soothing to me,it touched my heart and my soul,she provided me with a meal,although my stomach was starving it was begging for food,i guess the medicines were taking there toll on me , but my mind was still with my parents , with the tragedy that had killed them, the beautifully disguised Devil made me to drink milk and eat something that i cannot recall, but what ever it was , it quenched my hunger. then it was time for me to sleep, they put me in a modestly small bed, which was so small that i couldn't fit into it , maybe it was for a toddler, whatever it was , i couldn't sleep that night .. all i could think about was my family, and there was a little pain in my left leg now may be it was the lack of space that was troubling me ,around midnight i over heard a conversation between my new caretakers , they were fighting over something , then i heard one of them say, she will be burden on us it will be difficult to raise her . the voices died down in a while , but there was this uncanny terror in me that i could not sleep the whole night ! 

keep reading , there will be more !
Manisha